well we all made it through the first week of school. i had the kids fill out "getting to know you" papers so that i could learn about them. this is the class that i subbed for a LOT so i've had many of them in class before. one of the questions on the paper was, "who is your favorite teacher and why?" to which one student replied, "so-and-so is my favorite teacher. but you were my favorite sub." HA. i'll take the compliment, but it won't affect the grade. ;)
in other news, my endometriosis is back in full swing. hello, cyst. it is shooting pains down my legs, across my abdomen, and up my back. i am not having surgery again until they take it all, so i'll just have to live with it. DUMB.
i have asked justin to consider attempting to fertilize three eggs. i think he is leaning more that way, which is good. we are going to meet with the doctor again soon, at least by september 15 but maybe sooner. if we can get her to agree to implant three if they should all fertilize and grow, i imagine we will.
of course, chances of this resulting in triplets are slim to none - even twins are probably unlikely. but with 1/3 of the eggs generally fertilizing and growing, maybe we will have one awesome tiny baby. and maybe we will have three, and maybe we will have none. it's hard to tell.
i have been afraid that God will tell me that i am not supposed to have children. i know that most fertile people probably think that's ridiculous, but it's hard to knock the feeling. but He hasn't said that yet. i am hoping He honors our careful consideration with a child, but God doesn't always work like that.
i think that my biggest worry is money to pay for the IVF. we have enough for one cycle. we would freeze any extra eggs, and if we needed to go back and use those, we could attempt it, although the technology is still experimental (so much so that it is FREE to freeze, store, thaw, and then if they survive, fertilize them). the only cost there would be the meds and the transfer, which probably still comes to $5000, but that would probably be covered too. that's when the money runs out. i'm hoping it doesn't come to that.
i'm hoping we just get a miracle baby this month and forget all that. but then i think i'd take a miracle baby any month, really.
From a 'fertile' stand point, I don't think your fear that God will tell you you aren't supposed to have children is ridiculous at all. I'm always afraid He'll try to 'teach me something' by taking away the one I have, or making me endure something insanely difficult, and well, in my pov, that is where you are right now. Praying for 3 babies if you guys go that route ;) (And then for all of us to step up and help the craziness of 3 babies ;)
ReplyDeletei'm glad i'm not the only one...ugh. and thanks, we will be praying for the 3 as well lol! that would be a full house, and fast.
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